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Tuesday 26 May 2015

EDMUND'S ESCAPADES.

I have been on a French leave. I was reeling from shock, pain and disappointment. As I took up writing, I did not intend writing stories because I felt it was a norm. I heard a story over the past week which i felt was amazing. This particular story is worth sharing. If I did not know the origin of the story, I would have said that it was too bad to be true. This is a true story. Before I share, yesterday was African Union Day and prior to this "August" occasion, I have always harboured dreams of seeing a United States of Africa. A state of mind where the concept of "all for one and one for all" was our hallmark. Looking critically, I drew the conclusion that our individual internal differences was more than enough to scare away any thought of "universal unity". Can our situation change? Can Africa truly unite in practice more than theoretically? Back to my story. The events of the story are recounted as they were told......... Edmund (not his real name) sat in the barbering salon waiting his turn. As he looked up, he saw his reflection in the mirror. He began to wonder to himself if the events that were happening in his life were real. He shook his head as if to wake up from a bad dream but he could still hear the buzzing sound coming from the barber's machine. He still could not believe it so he checked his bank statement with his phone. To his amazement, he still had the Four Ghana cedis and eighteen (4.18) Pesewas in his account and physical cash of Five cedis. He had gotten his girlfriend pregnant again ( the first one was aborted due to reasons beyond his control as he always said) and as a result he had slept out of home due to the shock. He said it felt as if his troubles had graduated from a Bachelor's degree to a PhD. He began to wonder the effect the news was going to have on his poor mother since his girlfriend had threatened to tell her. His girlfriend was a handful. She was noted for throwing tantrums at the least occasion. She was also skilled in making a storm in a tea cup. Edmund was sure that before he got home, he was going to be met by his raging mother because he had had an argument with his girlfriend the night before. Already he had been served with a "query" by his mother to explain why his GPA had taken a dip in his third year in the University considering the bright start he had in his academic career. He was lost in thought when it got to his turn, the barber tapped him on the shoulder and asked him to take a seat. The barber had a field day with his head. He tossed it left, right and centre since he could not keep his head still. The journey back home was one of the longest he had embarked on even though his house was just two blocks away from the barber's shop. When he got to the doorstep, a rush like an epileptic seizure fell on him as he attempted to open the door. As he stepped into the hall, his mum had a visitor. The visitor was a familiar one. Edmund, in a bid to play it cool greeted his mother and put his hands on Jemima's head. Jemima was the daughter of the baker who lived behind Edmund's house and she doubled as his supposed "new girlfriend". She had come to deliver bread to the family. Edmund exchanged glances with Jemima. Unknown to Edmund's mother, Edmund had already "known" Jemima in the Biblical sense a couple of times (I do not think you need an explanation). On her way home she asked to speak to Edmund. She opened the main door with one hand, leaned backwards and said, "Eddie, I am pregnant". It was like a train had hit Edmund. He was now the proud "impregnator" of two young girls, he was broke and was failing his papers. What more can happen to such a person? The genesis of Edmund's dilemma would be recounted in the not too distant future. Watch this space for the continuation of "Edmund's Diary. My name is Edwin Oko Lamptey and this is a "true story" RAT (RANDOM AFRICAN THOUGHT). MORE AT randomafricanthoughts.blogspot.com Sponsors: PLAN COMMUNICATIONS www.plancommunication.com HERO CLOTHING BY Jamez www.herocollections.com. 0271044375

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