Monday, 11 May 2015


I was going through Facebook yesterday when I came across the status of a friend. It was quite disheartening to say the least that someone will say things about another person and not give that person the chance to clear their name. I was not really surprised because not too long ago, a prominent footballer had also put his family matters on "full blast" and the sad part of it was that it was in the full glare of the public's eye. I wonder the effect we seek to gain whenever we put private matters into the midst of a "not too objective" public audience who already have their preconceived bias and are only waiting to get supporting evidence to buttress their perceptions. We all need familial tender love and care. It is also true that come what may, our families will always come through for us in our times of distress. Some families are an envy to the world, others too are models of bitter lessons and experiences. This fact notwithstanding, it is a fact that the families we envy and so wish by some rare part of fate to be a part of have their strong differences and trials and the opposite is also true that the family that no one wishes to be a part of has also had their good times and unforgettable lasting impressions of joy, peace and love. Sometimes I can get really pissed by some of the things my parents do. When this happens, I vow that I would never speak to them for a long time but truth be told, it takes less than minutes for us to reconcile and get back to being family members once again. I know I am not crazy because a bunch of you have also had this going on in your minds. A family is one's priceless asset and it comes next to none as far as treasures and miracles are concerned. Family feuds and misunderstandings are bound to happen ( I do not intend to be a prophet of doom) because we are humans. We have mood swings, different ideas and ideologies and different perceptions (even identical twins tend to disagree on things once in a while). It also goes to buttress the point that we are growing and our personal worldviews are taking shape. In all this, I do not know whether to blame it on our favourite family system (extended). For a while, I have been thinking about "family stuff" and I found a few things that needed talking to. Some families, by whatever history or reason there is, seem to be in competition with each other. They take pride in the errors of other members and are the lead singers of "I told you so". They ensure that their "portion" of the family toe the line of "goodwill" (through fair and foul means) so as to win the certificate of praise singers as if there was a prize for it. It is also quite amazing the way and manner in which others too allow their misunderstandings to trickle down the family tree like the passing on of some torch. In these cases, the initial "perpetrators" expect their offspring to carry on from where they left off by ensuring that they put in whatever case they can to ensure that the feud continues. When I hear of such stories, I think to myself that the older generation will definitely die out so what then becomes of the family when the younger generation is brainwashed? More often than not, our families are the first relationships we form and if we do a bad job at it, it tells in our "public relations". Sometimes I wonder if family misunderstandings  are attributes of the fact that some people feel more "familial" love towards outsiders more than they do actual family members. Our families are gifts that have been bestowed upon us by divine selection let us therefore strive to keep it intact for posterity sake. We are each other's keeper. I cannot remember which part of the Bible I saw this but I believe I read " A house that is divided against itself cannot stand". Let us ponder over this Chinese proverb and think of its repercussions that "In a broken nest there are few whole eggs". My name is Edwin Oko Lamptey and this is a"family R.A.T (RANDOM AFRICAN  THOUGHT). More at
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