Thursday, 19 March 2015


I was at a restaurant some time back. I was waiting for a friend of mine. I had to wait longer than I thought because my friend was caught up in another commitment. In the course of my wait, a group of about six ladies walked into the restaurant. They had had seats reserved for them because they had come to celebrate the birthday of one of them. There were a group of guys already at the restaurant before I or even the ladies arrived. These ladies were seated directly across where I was sitting and started their own thing. They were laughing and giggling and sharing their presents with the celebrant. I saw the group of guys suddenly huddle up. I was sure they were planning on "crushing" the birthday party. After about 45 minutes of deliberations and planning, one of the guys, I think the bravest one started making his way to the table where the ladies were seated. I can only imagine the thoughts that went through his head as he made his way to the "ladies zone". When he got there he asked why the ladies had a cake and did not invite him. One lady offered him a slice and gave him a seat. He started a hearty chat with another lady and like clockwork, all the other guys started making their way towards the birthday table. Now, ladies, please pay attention because this is male psychology 101. Many guys dread rejection. We always want a warm reception. If the ladies at table paid no attention to the guy, he would have been the laughing stock of his friends. A lady can totally destroy a guy's confidence if she "shys" him like we say in Ghana. Most guys will not approach a lady because of this. When a guy who has been rejected by a lady sees her in the company of other ladies, his first thought is that they are "gossiping" about him. Guys appear to be more of attention seekers than ladies are. Most guys would only approach a lady if they get positive feedback. More often than not, we would wait for the lady to make the first friendly gesture. Guys are naturally shy and if you want to test a guy's resolve, look at him intently while he is speaking to you and he will fumble uncontrollably. When you speak to a guy and he cannot look you in the face, chances are he really loves you and has grown shy of you. If you want to know how a guy would treat you, pay attention to how he speaks to his mum or sister. If you happen to be seated close to a guy and you keep exchanging glances, chances are he wants to chat with you but doesn't know how to approach you. So please just approach him and introduce yourself. You are going to make his day. Guys are very jealous so please give them your utmost attention. It takes a whole lot of confidence to approach a girl we like. We get angry for no reason when we spot a girl we like so much just talking to another guy. We feel we are in a competition and you are a trophy. No matter how broke a guy is, he would try hard to impress you by taking you to a place you have always wanted to go. Guys love surprises so please surprises us all the time. I don't mean showing up unexpected but doing things that we like. Guys love football and if he changes the channel for you to watch a telenovela then it means he has committed an "offence" and he is trying to make it up to you. If all things are equal, please do not force us to watch your telenovelas with you. Most guys are of their best behaviour when they are with their crushes. Some guys would rather hide from a lady he likes than meet her on the stairs. Majority of guys are afraid of commitment because we know that we would meet prettier women. When a guy sees a lady he likes, he can compare it to hearing his favourite song. That is why we keep smiling all the time. Guys enjoy being teased with a particular lady by calling her his "wife". When a guy often calls you his wife, chances are he loves you. When you find a group of guys gathered please do not think they are talking about you. It is possible they are talking about football. They have noticed you but no one knows how to change the topic so we just fantasize about you individually. Every guy has a dream girl and the selection criteria is based mostly on external features. No matter the age of a man,he is automatically a baby when he is with the woman he loves. Ladies please handle us with care because today you know our secrets and you know we have big issues. Please be receptive, friendly and approachable. Thank you. This is Edwin Oko Lamptey and this has been a RANDOM  AFRICAN THOUGHT. More at

No comments:

Post a Comment