Thursday, 5 March 2015


I have a friend whom I am really fond of. She is amazing and has a high sense of humour plus she is very smart. She has an attitude that in a way puts me off. She is always in a hurry to jump into a new relationship when she encounters a break up and for some strange reason, she harbours high hopes that her next boyfriend would "wife" her. This hope is normally dashed because she wants her boyfriends to behave in a particular way thereby making her appear authoritative so the  guys end up "taking" what they want ( according to her) and leaving her. I am not against her dating people, I am only against the speed with which she jumps into a new relationship without sitting down to analyse herself to see if she is doing something wrong. This attitude got me thinking about  life in this way:
People are normally in a hurry in life and want some things to  be magically perfect but do not want to go through the process of living out life. I know a lot of people ( including myself) who do not go through the terms and conditions of applications we install on our laptops but expect the application to work. It might be the case that we are lazy because honestly, these terms and conditions are lengthy. In my view, it is just that we are of the mentality that so far as we have a copy of the application and seen it work for others, it should also work for us so we go ahead and just click and accept all the terms and conditions. When the application fails to work we sometimes get furious and exclaim that we accepted everything yet it does not work. In actually fact, it is likely that we might not need all the components of the application or that our laptops do not support the application or even so, we need another application to make the one you are planning to install work. This analogy with the application and laptop is the same with life. Most people do not take the time to go through the terms and conditions of life but want life to turn out beautiful for them. We normally rush through certain aspects of life and when it blows up in our faces we tend to blame everyone and everything but ourselves. We sometimes do not see what we are doing wrong when it comes to certain things like love and dating. There is nothing like a universal solution. You have to know yourself and know what you need to solve your problems. People are in a hurry to try out a new dish forgetting to ask of the ingredients of the dish. Just like eating something and being told afterwards that it was something you detested but you ate it anyway just because it was covered in chocolate. We are just ordinary people who are faced sometimes with extraordinary circumstances, we need to "take it slow" because there is no need to rush and crush when we can take it one "step at a time". Let us take a break, take stock of our lives so far, do some soul-searching and reflections so that the next time life presents any form of "terms and conditions" we would know what to accept. Everything turns out beautifully for those who are patient and strive to follow the due process. This is Edwin Oko Lamptey and this is a RANDOM  AFRICAN. THOUGHT. More at

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