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Monday 8 June 2015

EDMUND'S ESCAPADES V

Jemima's brother, Fred opened the gate but like every guilty person, as the gate flung open, Edmund thought it was going to be Jemima who opened it so he braced himself  for a "crash landing" only to be welcomed by little Fred, "Oh it's just you", Edmund said in a squeaky tone as he swallowed some saliva. Suddenly, what Edmund had just said dawned on him. "How are you my boss?", he added, to make up for the earlier comment. "Is Jemima at home?". "Yes, she is washing in the backyard", Fred said. Fred then jokingly yelled, "Jemima, the police woman's son is here to see you". Edmund's mother was known as the neighbourhood's watchdog so the children in the neighbourhood nicknamed her "the police woman". Edmund saw Jemima charging at him like a raging bull from a distance. His eyes could also not help but notice the drenched T-shirt she had on which had been made transparent by the water revealing her voluptuous bosoms and the rage caused them to dangle, which he thought was a pleasing sight. He had to quickly move from cloud nine to earth to quell the approaching storm. "What was that?", Jemima yelled as she got to where Edmund was standing. "What was what?", Edmund responded innocently as if he was being wrongly accused. "Where is your phone?", "A lady called me with your number, who was that?, "Do you think you can make me jealous?". Jemima kept firing at Edmund. Edmund stood there confused and Jemima realized it. Like the cunning fellow he was, he used it perfectly to his advantage, "I am at a loss for words". "I wish I had an idea of what you are talking about now". "Me?" "Called you?" "I haven't called you the whole of today and I am sure it was one of those scrambled network calls where someone tries to call another person and it bounces off to a complete stranger". "Come to think of it, did the person sound like me?", Edmund said. Jemima knew close to zero about telecommunications and the voice on the other end was feminine so her argument was floored by the "genius" Edmund. "I just hope that what you are saying is the case and not something else", Jemima said. Edmund followed Jemima to the backyard and they had a hearty chat till Jemima popped up with "Eddie, what are we going to do about the pregnancy?". "I am worried", she added with her eyes almost filling up with tears. Edmund wondered how women were able to change their moods so swiftly. One minute they are happy and the next minute they are sad. He had to assure her of her safety so he looked into her eyes and said "everything will be fine". "I will buy a pregnancy test kit so we do the test tomorrow okay?". That being said, they shared a kiss and Edmund found an excuse to leave her house. He went to the pharmacy and bought the after pill and pregnancy test kit. He went home, took his supper and a shower and started towards his girlfriend's house. As he walked down the quiet street, he whispered something like a prayer or so he thought. As he got to her house, she was not at home so he turned to leave. As he got to the gate, his girlfriend was also about entering the house so they met. "Hi love, I am just coming from the store down the street, "I had run out of sanitary pads". I have just had my monthly period, I guess I was not pregnant like I felt". Edmund could not contain the good news but he also had to keep his composure to avoid any trouble. He lifted his girlfriend into his hands and carried her to the door, "You must be tired from walking so let me give you a little treat", he said. He left his girlfriend's house feeling like he had won the lottery. He was so relieved that he felt like shouting but his joy was short-lived because he still had to deal with Jemima's "issue". He decided to pay Jemima a visit. She was sitting in front of her house when he got there but her back was turned towards him so he tip-toed towards her and covered her eyes with his hands from behind her. "Raymond, I have told you to stop doing that and what kept you so long?" Edmund, the master of secrets was caught off guard. Now he did not know whether to lift his hands and ask questions or whether to wish that he had not made the decision of going to see her. He wished that the ground could just break open and swallow him up. Was Edmund the only one keeping secrets?......... More to be revealed soon. My name is Edwin Oko Lamptey and this is a "true story" RAT (RANDOM AFRICAN THOUGHT). More at randomafricanthoughts.blogspot.com

Read EPISODES I to IV here in case you need to follow the story.
http://randomafricanthoughts.blogspot.com/2015/05/edmunds-escapades.html?m=1

http://randomafricanthoughts.blogspot.com/2015/05/edmunds-escapades-ii.html?m=1

http://randomafricanthoughts.blogspot.com/2015/06/edmunds-escapades-iii.html?m=1
http://randomafricanthoughts.blogspot.com/2015/06/edmunds-escapades-iv.html?m=1
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